Versuri 02. December 4th

Shawn Carter was born December 4th 
Weighing in at 10 pounds 8 ounces, he was the last of my 4 children 
The only one who didn't give me any pain when I gave birth to him 
And that's how I knew that he was a special child 
 
"Hi baby, what's wrong? 
You look like, you've lost your best friend 
Tell me, is it something that I've done again? 
You look like, you've lost your best friend tell me" 
 
They say, "They never really miss you till you dead or you gone" 
So on that note I'm leaving after the song 
So you ain't gotta feel no way about Jay so long 
At least let me tell you why I'm this way, hold on 
 
I was conceived by Gloria Carter and Adaness Revees 
Who made love under the siccamore tree which makes me 
A more sicker emcee than my momma would claim 
At 10 pounds when I was born I didn't give her no pain 
 
Although through the years I gave her her fair share 
I gave her her first real scare I made it from birth and I got here 
She knows my purpose wasn't purpose I ain't perfect I care 
But I feel worthless 'cause my shirts wasn't matchin' my gear 
 
Now I'm just scratchin' the surface 'cause what's buried under there 
Was a kid torn apart once his pop disappeared 
I went to school got good grades could behave when I wanted 
But I had demons deep inside that would raise when confronted, hold on 
 
Shawn was a very shy child growing up 
He was into sports and a funny story is 
At 4 he taught his self how to ride a bike 
A two wheeler at that isn't that special? 
But, I noticed a change in him when me and my husband broke up 
 
Now all the teachers couldn't reach me 
And my momma couldn't beat me 
Hard enough to match the pain of my pop not seeing me, so 
With that distain in my membrane 
 
Got on my pimp game 
Fuck the world my defense came 
Then Dahaven introduced me to the game 
Spanish Jose introduced me to cane, I'm a hustler now 
 
My gear is in and I'm in the in crowd 
And all the wavy light skinned girls is lovin' me now 
My self esteem went through the roof man I got my swag 
Got a vocal from this girl when her man got bagged 
 
Plus I hit my momma with cash from a show that I had 
Supposedly knowin' nobody paid Jaz wack ass 
I'm getting ahead of myself, by the way, I could rap 
That came second to me movin' this crack 
 
Gimme a second I swear 
I will say about my rap career 
Till 96 came niggas I'm here 
Good-bye 
 
Shawn use to be in the kitchen 
Beating on the table and rapping 
And um, until the wee hours of the morning 
And then I bought him a boom box 
And his sisters and brothers said that he would drive them nuts 
But that was my way to keep him close to me and out of trouble 
 
Good-bye to the game all the spoils, the adrenaline rush 
Your blood boils you in a spot knowing cops could rush 
And you in a drop your so easy to touch no two days are alike 
Except the first and fifteenth pretty much 
 
And trust is a word you seldom hear from us 
Hustlers we don't sleep we rest one eye up 
And a drought can define a man, when the well dries up 
You learn to work the water without workin', of thirst you'll die yup 
 
And niggas get tied up for product 
And little brothers ring fingers get cut up 
To show mothers they really got 'em 
And this was the stress I live with till I decided 
 
To try this rap shit for a livin', I pray I'm forgiven 
For every bad decision I made every sister I played 
'Cause I'm still paranoid to this day 
And it's nobody fault I made the decisions I made 
This is the life I chose or rather the life that chose me 
 
If you can't respect that your whole perspective is wack 
Maybe you'll love me when I fade to black 
If you can't respect that your whole perspective is wack 
Maybe you'll love me when I fade to black 
 
Now if you can't respect that your whole perspective is wack 
Maybe you'll love me when I fade to black 
If you can't respect that your whole perspective is wack 
Maybe you'll love me when I fade to black